May 30, 2004

Dear Doctor Fodero,

I have been overweight for as long as I can remember. I have never felt comfortable in this world. In the book, Alcoholics Anonymous, they refer to that feeling as “restless, irritable, and discontent.” I have worked a very spiritual and emotional program in order to finally feel comfortable inside my own skin. However, the physical changes that went on left me looking and feeling physically abnormal. I felt so joyous and serene about every aspect of my life except when I looked in the mirror or went shopping for clothes.

Trying to look normal took a lot of my thought and energy and was a party of my every waking moment. When I sat in a chair with arms my hips poked out between them. If the back of the chair and the seat didn’t meet, my buttocks stuck out the back. I tried to sit so my rear end wasn’t protruding through unlike everyone else’s, my mind half on what I was there for and half on what my hiney was doing. My shirts had to be long enough to cover my hips and butt, but then they tended to be too big in the shoulders. I never stood up without tugging my shirt down to make sure my butt and hips were covered up. I was constantly making sure my shirt wasn’t hitched on my “booty shelf”. Well, I think you get the idea.

I believe God gave you to me as a gift. How else could I have found you? Standing in the circuit at Curves and blurting out, “Does anyone know a good surgeon who could do a hernia repair and a major tummy tuck?” A woman I had never seen before and have not seen since said yes! This was down near Red Bank and you are in Livingston. What are the odds? I have learned to trust that the universe offers wonderful gifts if I will take them. Your talent, skill, and heart form a special gift. Thank you for sharing it with me.

You have provided me the opportunity to feel better about my body. You have given me a beautiful gift. I already feel normal. I have never felt normal in my own body. I always felt there was a thin person trapped in another body. Thank you for releasing the physical part of me that has been trapped for so many years. Already, in less than a week, I feel joyous and serene about my body.

You have changed my life. I hope you get some glimmer of the impact you have made from my feeble words. Tears are running down my cheeks as I think of what this means to me: to no longer feel shame; to feel free to show myself without trying to hide behind long tops and big jackets; to feel normal; to feel released.

You have corrected years of abuse that I had no ability to change, no matter how hard I tried. Thank you for your generosity. Thank you for your talent. Thank you for your caring. Thank you. Every day I will thank you.

With warmest regards and heartfelt thanks,

K.B.